Destroying Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow’s Today: Destination Anywhere…A Blind Philosophy…
Quite possibly it was a look of recognition, but no one had appeared to glance in my direction–But they had to know I was near. Sure enough, as I passed along the sidewalk, at the last instant, the sea of people parted just enough to let me slide through, as though their energies had sized me up enough to know that I was only 30 inches wide, thus needing only 31 inches of room between bodies to swimmingly squeeze sufficiently upstream towards another mass of people heading my direction, looking down, forward, minds constantly on what occurs forwards, never on the now, only the past instant, or a distant future…concerned only with the immediacy of the plans in their lives, or mythical plans for their future, for the future for their kids, plans existing only in their minds about what they need, what they needed yesterday, last year, how lucky they will be tomorrow, plans implanted in their tiny little heads from the moment they popped onto this planet, guided by others who had been guided by others on what is important, what they need to know, plans that they have had constructed by others on how to think, to think in terms of productivity, to think about worrying, worrying about pieces of paper called money, worrying about the future, worrying about fear, worrying about death, worrying about terrorists, worrying about worrying about worrying, dangling whats left of their zero iq minds out upon a branch hanging over an abyss, where their only motion is to march toward tomorrow…
Future? What does that even entail anymore? We have been force-fed futures upon our plates of existence in the forms of plans. What will we do after we graduate? What’s our long-term plan? 5 year? Ten year? Where do you see yourself in 25 years? 50?
Does anyone (has anyone?) really have the innovative vision any longer to foresee into the future with any clarity–much beyond the fact that they wish to be alive, have a bit of money, and hope they do not have the cancer? We can HOPE that our lives go according to plan? But whose plan? Whereas planning involves imagination, luck, and taking into account the action of the other 7 billion people that live on this planet, which is impossible, and, surprisingly, most people understand this basic fact, which is why everything nowadays is done on the fly…Its become a society of planning-on-the-go…whatever that means, since there are very few people alive nowadays that are able to use system recognition on a high enough level to actually survey and implement successful strategic planning. Without calm, a mind affixed within the present, then this whole world, and those that float unknowingly through it, is merely a destruction of moment after moment, built upon a foundation of arbitrary feelings tied together with thin strands of hope.
Plans turn to action, with that action hopefully equating positive returns: However the positive returns can be so subjective, and what action is it that they are aiming to have their plans achieve? What is the script they are following, and how is it that they have defined themselves, and how is it that they are moving according to how they have defined themselves? What are they? College turns into careers turns to marriage turns to kids turns to sit-down dinners turns to fears of savings turns to fears of security turns to fears of production turns to fears of old-age turns to fears of death, which turns into a race, a sprint towards a wish for more time, into there never being a future, but rather all those tomorrows continuously transforming themselves into just another today…
The wish for the majority of the time-consumed has always been the same saying–“I wish there was more time in the day!” If efficiency at its greatest yields the highest productivity, then how have we gone about in trying to reach this output? The biggest way in which Americans have sought to push ahead, to continue forward, remaining productive in all areas of their lives, in order to fulfill their dreams, their plans…has been with the ingenuity of eliminating the now. If this moment never occurs then it must mean that we are indeed one step ahead of Father Time, that we have not slowed down sufficiently to rest, to become inactive, unsuccessful, nor to contemplate exactly what we truly are.
The ambitious greed for creating more need has always consisted in the fact that those are pursuits towards the GAIN of something: Wealth, objects, pleasure, security…What has occurred now though is there has been a greater loss than the addition provided. Where did the time go? Where did the quality go? Sure the fastest horse with the blinders on wins the race, but it has no idea how it achieved it, has no idea what was going on around him as he pumped his legs and hurled through time and space in search of the fulfillment…and what was it that was fulfilled? who was fulfilled? how was it fulfilled? how long will the feeling of fulfillment last? how can life exist, have any sort of lasting meaning, if it is one series of fleeting fulfillments fixed to fleeting feelings?
What is it that is lost? Everything but the moment ahead…The past means stopping to remember, and that has become a waste of time (literally), the distant future requires imagination–dreams, an understanding of possibilities–Why think about that, it will get here soon enough!
For some of us–this is the future, this is yesterday’s tomorrow. But that is the point, there is never any destination achieved, always a destination postponed, always BEYOND the moment of gratification, always BEYOND your reach.
This is what we partied on the eve of the millennium for. No spaceships. No hovercraft cars. Where’s the robots to cook our meals? WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR!!!???!!!
The only machine that has seemingly increased in production has been the counterfeiting printing press inside the Federal Bank–cranking out more cash so we can all fast-forward ahead two more seconds, mortgage that future multiplied by future, that infinity TIMES infinity plus one, obsessively, compulsively ingesting our Zoloft™, Wellbutrin™, Anafranil™, Xanax™, Luvox™, Prozac™ Addarrol, Ritalin,(rapidly swallowing (stealing) our fears, our insecurities, our dreams, our sadnesses, our ideas, our responsibilities, our individuality, imaginations, futures)–not so we can concentrate now, but blurr the present, morph time into one incomprehensive landscape where it all looks the same, and fuel our minds for the seconds ahead when the drugs kick-in, and we become reborn as confident, fearless emotionless, robotically smiling productive members of society, until we lethargically fade back into whats left of the now (that’s where the Ambien™ comes into play). There is no patience for patience. There is no more time for a wait-and-see approach–there is no time for life–no time for death–the whole of existence has become perpetually chasing the rabbit racing two feet ahead of our noses.
Little are we aware that there is a wall (now?) that lies right around the corner that we shall run smack into eventually, unless we take the time to slow down and become conscious of our selfs and our actions, and how this world is made up of a number of individuals and is not fueling some massive collective consciousness. But we cannot only realize that other selfs are individuals, but that we are an individual too, that i am one and you are one, and that all I and you are is an amalgamation, a compilation of our nows, not a striving after ifs.
However, maybe a collision into anything is precisely what we need to wake us the fuck up!! And yet, these collisions, these walls, these explosions into the present, happen all the time, and for a moment they shatter and wreck our immediacy to the world, and yet, even when death peers its head into our lives and removes via guillotine the head of those we least expected, we cannot, do not, will not allow ourselves to redefine us, to warp out of this time continuum, and sit down on a cushion with eyes closed experiencing the breath, becoming the calm.
Ask someone if he thinks we have lost something recently? Maybe a second or two off the 24 hour clock? A feeling that things have sped up just a bit? The majority of the time the response will return that we have lost a lot more than a few seconds, probably a few minutes a day for the last twenty years ( or so it will feel). I have always looked at speed in the respect that I go faster in my areas of life because I want to get somewhere faster. I do not have the time to drive slower, run slower, type slower, write slower, because I need to get to the conclusion, the destination NOW!!
Where is our destination that we are hurtling to in such a hurry?
Do we even know?
Do we even care?
Like it or not, wherever we are headed, we will arrive sooner or later…I would just hate to end up, both as a society, and an individual–where none of us thought we were going…where there is no longer a future, a history, or a present…only a fulfillments of someone else’s plans.